- You can buy gifts but not love. You can pretend smile but not happiness. You can lie to others but not to yourself. You can have another friend but not as cute as I am!
- When you feel that nobody loves you, that nobody cares, when all you can do is cry and walk away because everyone is against you, then you are the weakest link. Goodbye!
- Someday you may lose your hair, you may lose your teeth, your money and even lose your mind. But one thing you will never lose - your good looks, coz you can never lose what you don’t have!
- When you are in love, you wish you were married. When you are married, you wish you were in love.
- I’m sure you were born in this world as a cute baby. Now that you’re a grownup, I have one question….. What happened?
- Reporter: How does it feel to become a millionaire?
Millionaire: Sad, because I am not a billionaire.
- God created the earth, God created the woods, God created you too, but yes, even God makes mistakes!
- This cat, is cat, a cat, good cat, way cat, to cat, keep cat, a cat, idiot cat, busy cat, for cat, 20 cat, seconds cat! Now read it all without the word cat!
- We will now upgrade your brain…….Please wait……..Searching…….Searching…….Still searching……..Sorry, no brain found !!!
- Your provider adjusted his rates. The rate is determined by the length of your genitalia, the shorter they are, the less you pay. You can telephone for free from now on!
- If you are alone, I’ll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I’ll be your shoulder. If you want a hug, I’ll be your pillow. If you need to be happy, I’ll be your smile. If you need money, wait for your salary
- We cannot grant you a life insurance policy because you are already 102 years old. “I do not understand. It is proven statistically that at that age only few people die.”
- If you have picture where you look old, keep them. In twenty years you can prove that you have not changed a bit.
- Hello, this is GOD. I make few bad creations but you are the worst monster I ever realised. My apologies on behalf of the whole world..
- God created the universe, the earth, nature, the eggs, man and saw that it was good and beautiful. God also created woman and thought : ‘I hope she will make herself up’!
